summer camp quest

This weekend I spent at Summer Camp. An adult kinky, poly, spiritual camp in the woods outside of DC. It's truly the only place I think I've ever been where I can be me fully, accepted and appreciated for who I am, what I look like and what my body is.

Toward the end of my time there I had an experience that continues to stay by my side. Some would call it a vision quest, some a heavy scene and still others would call it a crazy messed up thing to do.

There was a cleansing of the land around us, a grounding circle, some Lakota prayers and a blessing from our leader. I was attached to my partner Felice by a loop of rope tied to hooks embedded into our chests. Very little blood and no gore, just a means to connect our energy and allow it to flow as we pulled the rope between us and gazed into each others eyes (the gazing, an intense and relationship affirming thing to do in itself). We stood, then sat and pulled the rope with ease, and then pain, and tenderness between us. I felt the flow of old and new circling about us but the goods came in the night.

When the ritual concluded we were told by the leader to pay close attention to the messages we are given for the next few weeks or so. Felice and I had no plans for the evening and without intending to we slept over 10 hours that night. In the morning we spoke of our dreams. It's highly unlikely for me to remember my dreams but I was excited to tell her what I'd remembered. She told me hers first- about accidentally driving a bus slowly into the ocean and people on the bus being upset because it would delay their trip. The embarrassment or shame of causing the delay was her primary sensation. As she was telling me I shot up and said I'd had the same dream. It wasn't exactly the same but it was water and vehicles in the water, and in both of our dreams everyone was safe even though there was a probable tragedy waiting to happen.

My dream happened two times. The first was a small truck going off the road into a swamp and sinking. My dream thought was that someone sunk the truck intentionally so I was not worried. Then I had the same dream from a different perspective where I was talking to Felice and I actually saw the truck fall into the water from the road and watched a person rise to the surface and swim to safety. Like I said, in all dreams everyone was okay. The reality that we had such similar dreams sticks with us as we discuss the symbolism and meaning of each.

I spent the next night in NY with Liz and did not remember any dreams. The following night I had one more "everyone is safe in spite of possible tragedy" dream. I'm putting my brain to good use working out the details of these dreams and talking through the possibilities of meaning. There is some stress for sure but also healing and safety happening in these waters. Don't you agree?

Dfox is home from her weekend trip too. We spent some quality time gossiping about our adventurous weekends and the delicious fun we had respectively. I'm happy to be home and working on settling in.

Each day I look forward to the future and welcome what it brings.